The Roads I Had Taken

Here I am, in the middle of the night, sitting in my tinny room in Istanbul. While writing these texts, I am trying to remember exactly my ways, steps by steps bringing me to one of the most wonderful places in the world. When I looked back, I realized how far I was walking in my entire life, crossing the oceans, passing the mountains and walking on thousand miles of road.

Again, when I looked back to my early years, I still cannot believe my fate that I’ve been walking that far. Coming from middle income and working class family, I never lacked of anything. We always had food on the table, thanks God. My parents were never late to pay my school fee. I got at least one new clothe on Eid celebration (holy day of Muslims). But, traveling was something luxury in our family. Even traveling by plane seemed impossible and hard to do.

Can I say that my first flight ever was taken two years after I graduated from university? While I got the job out of town, and I had to leave my home for the very first time. I still remember clearly that day. I was crying, leaving my Mom and all lovely memories behind. That road was not easy, physically and mentally. That was the first time I was away from family, no one was there but me. But still, I had to go.

Nonetheless, these difficult roads had leaded me into other incredible roads to pass on. It was like a new door, opened to a new world, to a new destination. I kept walking and never looked back. It’s more one decade now, and I still keep going, collecting pieces of my puzzles and finding the meaning of my life, here and there. Through the skies, rivers, valleys, ocean, mountains. Move from one country to another. From the most developed countries to the counties where war is still going on. From Indonesian tropical beach to Saharan desert. From Arabian nights to African music. From the warm Asia to the cold Europe. And still, there are a lot of questions waiting for the answers to be found.

For some people, my life seems a fairy tale. Living a life. Getting my dream. And now, I’m living in my dream. Not once, my friends told me “I’m so jealous of you. You stole my dream”. But still, I feel like something missing.

Did I make myself useful enough to others? Did I give contribution to humanity? Did I give some times of my life thinking about child labors working for the mining companies in order to make our mobile phones while passing the  jungle of Congo? Did I dedicate myself enough for refugee children as I always wanted? Did I find what I’m looking for? And what I’m looking for? Power? Glory? Money? Love? Or someone to love and to be loved?

I still don’t get the answer yet. So far I know, I’m still walking. And I won’t stop until I get the answers. Even though I have to take another million roads ahead.

Medan, the city where I come from. Photo was taken in 2005

Medan, the city where I came from. Photo was taken in 2005

Nias, 2005

Nias, 2005

Blangkejeren, 2007

Blangkejeren, 2007

banda Aceh, Indonesia, 2008

Banda Aceh, Indonesia, 2008

Jakarta, Indonesia, 2009

Jakarta, Indonesia, 2009

Singapore, 2009

Singapore, 2009

Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, 2009

Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, 2009

Kinshasa, Democratic Republic of the Congo, 2011

Kinshasa, Democratic Republic of the Congo, 2011

Giza, Egypt, 2010

Giza, Egypt, 2010

Cape Town, South Africa, 2010

Cape Town, South Africa, 2010

Phuket, Thailand, 2010

Phuket, Thailand, 2010

Brazaville, Republic of Congo, 2011

Brazaville, Republic of Congo, 2011

Nairobi, Kenya, 2011

Nairobi, Kenya, 2011

Zanzibar, Tanzania, 2012

Zanzibar, Tanzania, 2012

Saudi Arabia, 2011

Saudi Arabia, 2011

Kampala, Uganda, 2012

Kampala, Uganda, 2012

Dubai, 2012

Dubai,UAE, 2012

Meknes, Morocco, 2012

Meknes, Morocco, 2012

paris, France, 2013

Paris, France, 2013

Amsterdam, Netherlands, 2013

Amsterdam, Netherlands, 2013

Bratislava, Slovakia, 2013

Bratislava, Slovakia, 2013

Prague, 2013

Prague, 2013

Budapest, Hungary, 2013

Budapest, Hungary, 2013

Jordan, 2014

Jordan, 2014

Muscat, Oman, 2015

Muscat, Oman, 2015

Istanbul. Turkey, 2017

Istanbul. Turkey, 2017

For more roads, kindly visit the Daily Post.

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